Lifestyle Changes

Tracklist:
September - Earth, Wind & Fire
Island In The Sun - Weezer
Forever Young - Youth Group
Beautiful - Christina Aguilera
For Once In My Life - Stevie Wonder
________________________________________

I am first going to start this one off by saying I am in no means trying to sway you in one way or another with this post. This is about my choices in my life, and whatever you choose for yours is 100% up to you because you have the right to do so, as do I.

I set out back in September of last year to find myself. I had somehow lost who I was after graduating college and I felt as if I was losing the purpose of my life. If anyone ever tells you that life is easier with a college education, they are lying to you. Yes, it may be more helpful in the long run, but just soon as you walk across that stage your life becomes immediately more difficult. These difficulties have hit me like that wrecking ball did that wall in Miley's music video. And I was only half prepared for it.

I spent the four months following graduation pretty miserable. I had a new job that I loved, yes, but of course that was not enough. But then September came along. I credit a lot of these changes I am going to tell you about to being introduced to new music. It's going to sound really lame of me when I tell you this story but I know I'm not the only one to feel this way about this band, or any other band for that matter. For my birthday, which is in September, I was sent 5 Seconds of Summer's debut album by my friend Brittany. Of course, I was skeptical. She had bugged me about them practically every day up until this day and wanted me to listen to them and give them a chance. So I did. I don't think I have ever taken to music so fast. Their sound is what brought me in. Not their looks, or their accents (of course, all of that came into play later). Their music took me back to middle and high school, a horrible time in my life, but full of great music. Music was the only reason I made it through those years. Music from bands like Three Days Grace, Hey Monday, Linkin Park, Breaking Benjamin, Green Day, and so forth, you get it. Bands like the ones I used to listen to aren't really as popular anymore. It's all about funky pop, or electronic dance club music now. There's nothing wrong with that music, it just isn't my cup of tea. When I listened to the album it took me back to all of those times I sat in my room as a teenager, soaking in every detail of a song and just genuinely being happy despite the fact life around me was falling apart. Music helped me through those years, and in September it did it again. I started listening to my old favorite bands again and all the memories each song brings back are ones I never thought I would get back. I owe Brittany for a lot of things, but sending me that album may be the greatest thing she has ever done for me.

So now with this great music back in my life, where do I go from here? I went a little drastic with my next step into finding myself. I slowly started changing my eating habits, to where by the end of September I was strictly on a vegan diet. I was absolutely one of those people who used to say, "Oh, I can't be a vegan because I love cheese way too much," or chocolate, or whatever else I thought would hold me back. The truth is, it isn't bad at all and I now enjoy not having meat or dairy in my meals, because after all it still is a choice. I feel a million times better and have an incredible amount of energy. I've actually started to get into shape and even though I have a long way to go, I know I am healthy and even the people I work with identify me as the 'healthiest' person they know. This is definitely something I never thought anyone would ever call me. I enjoy being that person though. People are always asking me about my eating habits, and even though sometimes I just want to tell them grass, I know they respect my decision and they just want to learn more about it. So vegan I will stay.

Now I have always been one to be open to a lot of things, usually. Depending on the circumstance, I guess. That being said, I have also been a recluse most of my life. I enjoy being by myself and honestly have no problem with staying in on nights and weekends just to spend time with me. I've never been one to have a lot of people to hang out with anyways. I always lived too far away from my friends so being by myself just came natural to me.

October 23, 2014. The day I officially told myself that always wanting to be alone shouldn't come natural to anyone. Again, this post goes back to Brittany (I'm telling you she's something special). Brittany and I met through very special circumstances: Tumblr. Now usually, Tumblr or any other online relationship doesn't go beyond that, online. I've been reading In Real Life by Nev Schulman (he hosts Catfish on MTV) and it is full of talk about how people online are not always as they seem and how risky online relationships/friendships are, emotionally speaking. However, I do believe Brittany and I are an exception to Nev's observations. I'm getting off topic rather quickly here. Anyways, Brittany and I decided that we should bring our relationship/friendship full circle and basically end where we began: a One Direction concert. Not that we plan on ending our friendship after this concert, but we also know they aren't going to be around forever so what better time than now? I assured her we would be going to a concert even though they were not coming anywhere close to either of us (she lives three and a half hours away from me). It didn't matter though, we would make it happen. They were the sole reason we even knew one another after all. After convincing her it would happen, in Baltimore to be exact, I thought about the possibility of bringing in more people so cut the traveling costs, people I had also met through Tumblr and One Direction. I did just that and she did as well with people she had met in the same way. In the end, we had a group of eight One Direction Tumblr girls ready to head up to Baltimore. From two to eight, it was a pretty magical moment. Everything fell into place in every way we needed it to and there was no denying that this was meant to happen.

These girls have had such an impact in my life, even in the short amount of time I have known them. Most of us only know one or two others in the group on a personal level, but that makes it so much more fun for everyone else. I love these girls and would do anything for them and hope I have proven that to them on as many occasions as I can. These girls are going to be my friends for life, I am absolutely certain of that. What I am also certain of is by having this group in my life I am transforming into the person I am going to be from here on out. Someone that yes, enjoys her time alone, but will always be up for spending time with the people I love the most.

So I have great music, a healthier diet, a great new group of friends, what else could possibly need changing? Little known fact, just because you have all of these great things happening, does not mean that you are not affected by stress, not in the slightest. I had all of these wonderful things coming into place in my life, but I still wasn't able to handle the stress that was pushing in from outside this little world I had created for myself. I have taken the saying from Shay Carl, 'Choose Happiness'. I have tried my best to live up to these words in every part of my life, but of course I falter, and in big ways sometimes. I enjoy that saying, but I needed something more. I was letting the stress from work and pressure to 'be an adult' get to me and I was not liking who I was becoming. I needed another change.

Taking up meditation is something I have only recently chosen to do. The difference I am seeing in my attitude towards life and the decrease of clutter from my mind is enough for me to make it a permanent change. I find peace and true happiness when I sit down in silence, or with tranquil meditation music playing, for the forty-five minutes I have allotted and allow my mind to explore. Not think, just explore.

I am fully aware that mediation can sometimes be thought of as a religious thing. No, I have not gone and converted to Hinduism. I love my God and have no plans of ever leaving Him. However, Namaste is something I feel anyone, from any religion, can live by. Just believing in the meaning behind this simple greeting has brought me peace, which is the sole reason I began this journey of trying to find myself. I just wanted to be able to do something that could bring me happiness and tranquility because at this point in my life that is desperately what I need. I want nothing to do with stress, whether it be with people, life, or growing up, I want no part of it. I not only want people to say I'm the 'healthiest' person they know, I also want them to be able to say I am the 'happiest' person they know. Simply because there is absolutely nothing wrong with being happy and I will stand by that statement until I am no longer on this earth.

At this point in my life I am in the middle of discovering a lot of things about myself. Every day I am challenging myself to find peace, while trying to branch out, in addition to continuing to live a healthier life. I've never been more happier with my life and everything that is happening in it. I owe a lot of people a lot of things on this journey and I hope that as I continue walking this path, with these changes I've made, they see their in me their work alongside my own and know what a difference it has made.

Callie
xx